Team behind FX's Archer to release country music album, complete with cover of "Danger Zone"

This past Monday, the reliably bonkers FX comedy Archer kicked off its fifth season with an excellent episode that set up the criminally incompetent spies at ISIS with a new gig as actual criminals. Buried within the gargantuan pile of jokes was a bit about how ISIS secretary/arson enthusiast Cheryl Tunt planned to become a country singer- she even sang a country tune over the episode's closing minutes. People watching at home could be forgiven for thinking it was a throwaway gag, but not only will Cheryl's country career be an ongoing story arc, FX will be releasing a 12-track digital album of original Cherlene songs on February 17.

The album, tastefully titled "Cherlene," will feature songs with Cheryl-ish titles like "It's All About Me," "I'll Burn it Down," and "Gypsy Woman." In a nod to one of the series' many, many recurring jokes, it will also feature a cover of Kenny Loggins' "Danger Zone," with Loggins himself joining Cherlene for a duet on one of Sterling Archer's favorite tunes. All of the tracks were produced by Kevn Kinney, frontman for the Southern rock back Drivin' N' Cryin', with country singer Jessy Lynn Martens providing the singing voice for Cherlene. The whole project is nicely ambitious and bodes well for the show's fifth season. If the Archer team cares enough to put this much thought into a side project, imagine how hard they must have worked on the actual episodes of television.

Watch The Simpsons' animated tribute to Hayao Miyazaki

In September of last year, beloved animation director Hayao Miyazaki announced that he is retiring from making movies. No, for real this time. To honor the 73-year-old filmmaker, or possibly just because, the animators over at The Simpsons set about creating a lush, elaborate promo thick with references to Miyazaki films like My Neighbor Totoro, Kiki's Delivery Service, Princess Mononoke, and about 30 different allusions to Spirited Away. Watch it below.

China and Japan compare each other to Voldemort, crossing line that cannot be uncrossed

Japan and China have always had an antagonistic relationship. After several failed invasions and a pair of Sino-Japanese wars, this can only be expected. But recently, relations between the two countries reached a new low after they compared each other to Lord Voldemort, megalomaniacal dark wizard and the primary antagonist of J.K. Rowling's Harry Potter book series.

The war of words began after Japanese Prime Minister Shinzo Abe visited the Yasukuni Shrine, a Shinto shine built to honor those who have died in service to Japan. As of 1978, the honored dead include several Japanese soldiers convicted of war crimes committed against Chinese citizens during World War II, a fact that has caused tension between the two nations before. Liu Xiaoming, China's ambassador to the UK, criticized the visit in literary terms, giving readers a big hint as to how he spends his time while flying between London and Beijing:

In the Harry Potter story, the dark wizard Voldemort dies hard because the seven horcruxes, which contain parts of his soul, have been destroyed. If militarism is like the haunting Voldemort of Japan, the Yasukuni Shrine in Tokyo is a kind of horcrux, representing the darkest parts of that nation’s soul.

Japan's British ambassador, Keiichi Hayashi, responded in kind, although with a slightly less nuanced knowledge of Potter particulars:

East Asia is now at a crossroads. There are two paths open to China. One is to seek dialogue, and abide by the rule of law. The other is to play the role of Voldemort in the region by letting loose the evil of an arms race and escalation of tensions, although Japan will not escalate the situation from its side.

The ambassadors' inboxes were promptly flooded with letters from Harry Potter fans advising them on the finer points of Potter mythology, and a few from concerned citizens about the ongoing conflicts between their countries. This past Sunday, Chinese President Ma Ying-jeou made his own statement and gave the debate a new, non-Harry-Potter-based focus.

Now someone has recreated Reservoir Dogs on Twitter

Using 15 Twitter accounts, 1,125 tweets, and a boatload of love, Argentenian advertising creative Jorge Zacher has tweeted the entire script for Quentin Tarentino's 1992 movie Reservoir Dogs, employing one Twitter account for each of the fourteen speaking parts, plus an extra one for narration. Zacher tweeted the last part of the movie first and worked his back backward through each line of the film over the course of two days, so it now unfolds from the top down for your enjoyment. If you enjoy Reservoir Dogs but have tired of viewing the conventionally produced version, or if you just don't have it on DVD, than this may be for you.

Italian promotional poster reimagines 12 Years A Slave as a Brad Pitt vehicle

Remember watching 12 Years A Slave, the harrowing account of a free black man's experiences as a slave in pre-Civil War Louisiana? And remember how, about four-fifths through the movie, Brad Pitt shows up for one scene as a kindly drifter and it was like: 'This is sort of weird. What's Brad Pitt doing in this movie?' Well, Mr. Pitt made such an impression that BIM Distribuzione, the company responsible for marketing the movie in Italy, created posters giving Pitt top billing and featuring his head framed front and center, back-lit by a dappled mid-afternoon sky. Chiwetel Ejiofor, the film's star, is relegated to the right-hand corner. For good measure, the distributor also created a poster giving top billing and prime poster real estate space to Michael Fassbender, who plays Ejiofor's abusive owner.

After making their debut at Italy's Capri Hollywood Film Festival last month, the posters went on to quickly offend people. BIM Distribuzione has since recalled the posters and issued an apology. "We apologize for creating and releasing unauthorized posters for 12 Years A Slave in Italy featuring Brad Pitt and Michael Fassbender in a manner inconsistent with approved advertising materials... We are very proud of the film and regret any distraction this incident may have caused."

12 Years A Slave will be officially released in Italy on February 20, 2014.

 

Discover one of cinema's most overused lines with this supercut

Sometimes it take a lovingly crafted supercut to make you realize just how often a certain line of movie dialogue has been repeated over and over and over and over. The folks over at FilmDrunk have crafted such a supercut based around the line "You just don't get it, do you?" which is used often enough to fill out eight-plus minutes of funny. No one is immune- not action stars, not animated lions, not Julie Andrews wearing a pair of fluttering fairy wings. Watch below, and view the corresponding list of movies here.

Check out this beautifully illustrated edition of Joseph Conrad's Heart of Darkness

Originally published in 1899, Joseph Conrad's novella Heart of Darkness follows steamboat captain Charles Marlow on a densely symbolic journey up the Congo River into the rotting center of colonial Africa. Now, Tin House Books has published a new edition featuring an illustration to go along with each and every page. The artwork, by Ohio artist Matt Kish, is impressionistic, evocative, and borderline terrifying. Enjoy, if that's the word for it, some of the more visually potent images below.

Before this, Kish produced a fully illustrated version of Moby Dick which is also worth a look.